For the last 20 years, my twin and I are being treated as one individual. Since the first day of kindergarten my teachers called me with my family name, since they find it easier than trying to guess if I am Yasmin or my twin sister Rawan. Later on, in high school, I started correcting my teachers if they call me Rawan, and tell them that I am Yasmin, but they used to say, “it does not matter you look the same”, even though we are fraternal twins. Another thing that we have been struggling from is the misconceptions that people have about twins. They assume that twins talk at the same time, get sick together, and dream the same dreams, not knowing that twins are like any other siblings. Actually, the only difference between normal siblings and twins is that twins have the same birth date. Treating twins as one individual will let them find it hard to shape their own identities as they grow up, find it tough to make their own friends and even to differentiate their own opinions.
Not making effort to tell twins apart diminishes them as individuals (Fierro, 2020). When you ask twins “which one are you?” you will absolutely let them feel that they do not matter for you and they do not matter as individuals. The first thing that will come to their minds is that you did not put any effort to know them, because humans believe that if you care for them you will know what makes them different. When it comes to twins’ physical appearance, there are a lot of differences. For instance, my twin’s hair is longer than my hair. Another example is that I have almond shaped eyes and she has rounded down shaped eyes. Believe me we have several differences that identifies us physically that is why we feel offended when someone asks us “which one are you?”
Assuming that twins like doing the same things causes twins to rethink their opinions and get confused (Fierro, 2020). Most of the time my twin and I are asked “why do not you attend the same university?” or “why do you major in different fields?”. For a moment, these questions get me confused. Sometimes they make me feel guilty for being me. When my twin traveled on her own, some people started telling me that I should have traveled and that I should not reject to travel. Some people also started asking me how I left her on her own, as if we are a package. Another thing that people also comment on is that why do not I keep my hair long like my twin’s hair, as if I am forced to like long hair because my twin does. This misconception of twins thinking and acting the same causes us to doubt ourselves. Think about it this way, if a person comes and asks you why you are shorter than your older brother or sister, would not you start feeling guilty for something you could not change or even choose. This applies to everyone, if every time you see two friends and compare them together you will make them feel annoyed, guilty, and incomplete.
By individualizing twins, together we can prevent harming their feelings by moving a step closer to changing our preview of twins and replacing misconceptions with true harmless facts. I know that none of you have the direct power to change the way twins around the world are treated as one person, but a lot of you will make a change when they start putting effort when it comes to treating twins. So, next time you meet twins do not ask them questions that make them feel incomplete and guilty. You will be helping these twins to forge their identities easier and without causing them any internal harm.